As roses bloom

near a magnificent pine,

whose needles litter the soft wet

ground, I muse at the glorious scene

of a bird playfully  chasing another bird

of a much larger size. I ponder my pursuit

 of a wise God that spoke  existence into the

 form as I see it  from under the pine's lovely

shade. The small bird never catches the one

that is larger, yet I feel there is something

more than my pursuit, a purpose to my

being upon this earth. So I begin to

fulfill that purpose, and raising

my voice I cry aloud,

Thank-you, heavenly Father, I give you all the praise!

                                                                         L

                                                              F         O         

                                                          C     L      V      N  D 

                                                         O       E     E    I       N

                                                          N        S   J   K       E

                                                            T          O       S

                                                              R        Y    S

                                                                 O     P

                                                                     L  E

                                                                         A

                                                                         C

                                                                          E

                                                                           P 

                                                                            A

                                                                              T

                                                                                 I

                                                                                   E

                                                                                     N

                                                                                       C

                                                                                          E

Keyword: Spherical Soliloquy

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Comments (16)

Posted by gorgeous_chik7 2008-09-05 13:39:39 Great! Wow. I love your descriptions. I love how you use words. I, of course, can't ignore the pattern and design of the words - forming such a great shape. It reminds me of a closed rose or flower of some sort. Great job! Keep writing! Thanks for sharing! + Report this comment
Posted by harmattan 2008-09-05 14:18:55 SS Wonderful words Clever form. Nature well observed. MDC, you have a calling, I have no god. But one day I will amaze you by quoting my favourite hymn! + Report this comment
Posted by sTiCkFiGuRe 2008-09-05 14:59:00 .... Maybe its just me, but I just don't understand what the hell ..ooops sorry...you are saying here...and is that suppose to resemble an egg? Just not sure what your pursuit or purpose is. This poem has made me hungry. + Report this comment
Posted by allmine 2008-09-05 15:33:45 .... Whether or not you are a religious person or not, you should accept the words for an acceptance of the greatness of the world around us. I do know that nauture becomes more precious to me as I get older...so take that for what you will... + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-09-05 16:59:26 .... These poems are difficult for me, yet that is the reason why I enjoy writing them. Just to put words on a page is okay, but to keep a message powerful in a limited amount of spaces and in a certain shape and still keep a flow is fun and challenging. Thanks for the comments. About the shape, it was meant to be a globe, yet when I posted it on this site it was adjusted to the shape you see now. It looks different on Microsoft Word. Yet it looks like a teardrop, or like the first comment, a flower about to bud. These interpretations will fit also. + Report this comment
Posted by Bianki Torres 2008-09-05 18:06:23 Good Liked the form Your description worked well with it's shape But you could have been more broad especiallly with the message you were using + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-09-05 18:13:55 .... I don't quite understand what you mean by broad? I mean, the subject of God has been written in many volumes of many different religions. I believe in a simplfied relationship of praise to the One that has created all things. To do what you say, I would have to become the little bird chasing the bigger one and never succeeding. I think you missed the point of the story. + Report this comment
Posted by scooby 2008-09-05 18:27:43 .... This was a really good poem and I love how you put a simple message into a shape. To me, the shape almost looks like a flame shooting out of a lighter. + Report this comment
Posted by ams 2008-09-05 19:18:50 .... when i first saw this before i even read it, i thought it was a rosebud. i then thought i was right because the first line talks about the rose, but after reading your comment i realized i was wrong. amazing poem though! the message was really good, i do believe that God gives us all a purpose to be here.i also thought that the content was just find, i didnt think it needed to be more board or anything. + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-09-05 19:28:39 .... That's it, it's a rose! Well, on this site it will be a rose, maybe not on Microsoft Word. It does fit. I like it. Oh no, do I have to change the title? + Report this comment
Posted by Ashutosh 2008-09-06 02:25:17 .... Pretty Good, Matt. Beautiful words, used beautifully in a beautiful poem.For just the poem, I'd rate 4 but along with the format, it definitally deserves a 5 star rating. Good effort you put into this poem. Keep writing. And I think you should change the title. And yes, it does look like a flower..a rose bud, to be precise. + Report this comment
Posted by garyowen 2008-09-06 17:12:25 .... cetainly some work and craft whent into this poem pilgrin and all credit to you for that + Report this comment
Posted by lemon 2008-09-07 17:46:38 .... Clever poem. I liked how you fit the fruits of the spirit in this. These poems of yours are very ingenious. it's great that your images created by the words actually have something to do with the poem and not just 'look i can make a picture' lol Great job =] + Report this comment
Posted by Lonepoet 2008-09-09 20:56:29 Rendition Of A Rose Wonderful words captured in an excellent display. Look forward to more. Lonepoet + Report this comment
Posted by ams 2008-09-10 13:55:45 .... i clicked on this for a reread and i noticed that you added the stem to the rose. I really liked that and i thought that it was a good idea. i hope to see more poems like this! + Report this comment
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