Meditate.  Percolate.  Gravitate.

Dumb hobo.  He walks into my lane, staring me dead in the eyes and he holds his index finger up in the air towards me.  I swerve around the nutcase.  In my mirror, he stands in the road looking after me—his index finger still extended.  I drive on.

What was that about?

Probably nothing.

I thought he was flipping me off at first, but nope—it was the index finger.  I guess he’s Numero Uno.

Deliberate.  Procrastinate.  Permeate.

Contemplate.

The chick just wanted to be friends.  Figures.  Guess I had it coming; no one wants a cheating boyfriend.  But cheating friends are okay, they remind you of how good you are.  We all need that assurance, “Look at how bad that person is—thank goodness I’m not that much of a loser.”  Yeah, we need that.

“Dumb hobo,” beneath the breath I say, and I am reassured of my own sanity and status.  I have status.  I am status.  I am more than an am.  I am we.  We are one.  We are am.  And, tomatoes are disgusting—get with the program, my peeps.

For the record, those weren’t typos.  Get over it.

Had an older brother once.  His body swayed back and forth for a moment on the pickets of the fence, legs kicking, his hands gripping the pickets beneath him.  He didn’t try long, only for a moment.  Stupid kid.  Had to get on the bottom of the rail as I released my grip, my feet slid and planted themselves into his back and he flew.  He was a bird for a moment.  He was the jealousy of the Wright brothers for a moment.  And then, no one was jealous of him.

“Idiot!” was what I proclaimed to his body atop the pickets.  And he was.  It confirmed my sanity, my status.  I would never have done that.  I was always smarter than him, anyway.  He had it coming.  Not that I did it on purpose, but we all have it coming when are brains are that inferior to others.  Someone once said that only the strong would survive.

I am sanity.  I am status.  I am strength.  I am a survivor.

I know, you hate me.  But that’s okay, I hate you, too.  We have that in common, you know.  Too bad you’re an impotent hussy.  I draw the line at impotent hussies.

Accelerate.  Transmigrate.  Levitate.

I have washed the plates, cups, pans, silverware and pans 3,018 times.  I own none of them.  And I have washed them 3,018 times.  That’s right, you come up in my kitchen, use my dishes, dirty them up good and leave—then, I wash them.  Why?  Because you are status.  I am status, but not your status.  We are status.  We are different statuses.

But—I am status, sanity and strength.  And I am a survivor.  You believe you are greater status, that you are greater sanity and strength.  But you are no survivor.  You are not surviving, you are dying.  I am not dying.  I am living.  I am.

Initiate.  Deviate.  Relocate.

Contemplate.

Keyword: You as I see It

Report this story | Add to Favorites | Send to Friends | Author's Profile

No Comments posted

Comments (3)

Posted by philneale1952 2008-08-08 07:41:55 ????? Not following this one at all Nathan, sorry. I don't know whether it's a story or just an expression of personal feeling. Perhaps you could shed a bit of light please. + Report this comment
Posted by onyxdragon 2008-08-08 08:33:38 Trivia 1. The homeless man incident actually happened to me the other day. There was something very surreal about it. I did think he was flipping me off at first, but he wasn't. It was quite creepy. Though, I didn't call him a "dumb hobo", that's just mean. He obviously wasn't all there. 2. The older brother incident is a reference to Alfred Hitchcock's "Spellbound." 3. I washed dishes as a delivery driver at Pizza Hut for 2 years, and it pretty much makes you feel this way sometimes. To get the number 3,018 I multiplied 365 days by 10 years, then subtracted 100 days and then 532 days. So, Link has been washing dishes anywhere between 8 to 10 years. + Report this comment
Posted by Halios 2008-11-19 10:06:37 hmm A bit harder to read than the first two. The older brother incident was the hardest part to gather what was going on. But overall not too bad. Keep it up. + Report this comment

Post a comment

Post a comment