Posted by r.e.potter
2008-07-31 14:12:34
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Hey, our drummers back. The whole band is touring again. Great poem of lust found at a bar,,,been there.
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Posted by r.e.potter
2008-07-31 14:22:21
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oops sorry,,coffee shop...hey,,been there too.
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Posted by philneale1952
2008-07-31 15:41:15
Hmmph!
Clearly I've been hanging around in completely the wrong places.
You got the address for me Terry?
Liked the poem once I'd figured out where the sentences ended.
That's a criticism of me not you. I don't do poetry too well (ask the man above), but I'm learning.
Phil
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Posted by Tarhead Mugwump
2008-07-31 20:49:44
as always
your material tends to always be one literal step ahead of me. it is always a pleasure to read your work, your timing is as unique as the stories they contain.
write on!
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Posted by C.R. Vard
2008-07-31 22:14:22
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well written, different style but i suppose i'd have to kill myself if everything was the same. anyways a nice departure from the norm; it's good to see you writing again.
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Posted by eternalsunshine
2008-08-01 10:07:06
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This flowed well, I liked how the only way it really seemed like a poem was in the way it was formatted. I feel like the breaking up of sentences between lines worked better in some places than others. Example: good:
"Foreignness in her speech,
Her tone, the way the words
Came out"
And confusing:
"The girl in the coffee
Shop, something in the way"
(why is coffee shop divided up?)
Overall, good. Excellent description.
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Posted by The 13th
2008-08-01 13:24:43
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Hey, good to see you back Terry.
Not really good with poetry but I got this.
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Posted by resistanceisfreedom
2008-08-01 15:49:01
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i thought this was pretty good. your style is one that i always find interesting.
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Posted by Sad Sara
2008-08-01 21:30:38
Cafe
Hi Terry
Oh yes it be very nice to be have you back here and post Poetry fer me to read.
This part here-
-Foreignness in her speech,
Her tone, the way the words
Came out; but that did not
Detract from her beauty,-
Oh my, I definitely have to say that I not only rather fond of, but I like how I be get feel like I can somewhat relate to it as well.
I great see you again, welcome back.
Keep very well,
'Anna
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Posted by Something Indecent
2008-08-03 01:45:00
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I liked the quiant(?) atmosphere of this poem. It wasn't painful or depressing. I found it to be more like longing in the everyday sense. You did a good job with this.
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Posted by garyowen
2008-08-04 03:21:59
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Nice to see you back terry. I have to admit to being hank in this one. and you capture me with style. A flat white coffee with 'the sweetness of her swaying hips'
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Posted by Terry Collett
2008-08-04 11:15:31
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Thank you all. Once I have got some more credit(sounds like damn bank don't it?) I will put something else on.
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Posted by allmine
2008-08-06 12:24:11
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Whoo hoo...you're back! I love your poetry. It's always very lyrical and graceful. That and you have the most interesting subjects. Glad to see that you have come back to the humble abode again
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Posted by harmattan
2008-08-07 05:23:03
polish
Hi Terry
I am fairly new here
I clicked on you and this for two reasons.
First of all you have a picture and a profile that tells me something, and secondly, my first wife (1967) was Polish.
It is obvious from the comments above that you are well loved.
I am going to love you too if this is the sort of thing you do.
Thankyou.
Kind regards
Harmattan/
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Posted by Zombie Punk
2008-08-08 14:07:51
The Polish Dame
Well, there isn't much I can say here that everybody else hasn't, is there?
It bloody great, to say the least.
I wonder who this mysterious 'Hank' is, though.
Good Work, Sir. Always enjoy a Poem by you.
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