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I Will Lay In Vain

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The River


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Written by Anna DeVine   
Monday, 07 July 2008
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The River






Was it her discussion

 Of murder failing fate

Why chaos left his silence

To disambiguate?

 

Are nightmares really answers

Of every promised word

 To feel his evil whispers

As hate she's over heard?

 

Or has he finally found her

To steal her tired breath?

For surely he is seething

To learn she's cheated death

 

Perhaps it's for the bloodshed

In his distorted heart

And he's returned to paint her

As his sadistic art?

 

Or does he owe the river

The breath she didn't last

  And drowning her's the reason

She's claimed him as her past?

 

  

 

 

 




Copyright 2008 Anna DeVine
Keyword: River
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Comments (9)
Posted by Zombie Punk
2008-07-07 09:50:11
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and she comes back with a grand slam! that was awesome poem, really. it flowed with a dark tone. the picture was eerie in a way. keep up the great works or art!
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Posted by June Eclipsis
2008-07-07 13:11:57
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Damn! I would have never been able to write with rhyming words. Great job.
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Posted by brandon_scott
2008-07-07 14:47:44
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I agree with June: the rhyming in the poem was phenomenal. I'm not too sure that I understand the meaning behind it, like maybe it's just out of my grasp. But, it flowed very well, and the rhetorical questions that were asked in the poem worked very well. Great job!
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Posted by sTiCkFiGuRe
2008-07-07 15:44:39
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This was good as are all your poems,,a rare talent yer are.
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Posted by lemon
2008-07-07 20:50:39
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This was good, I really enjoyed it. Your poetry always seems effortless. =]
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Posted by Amatayo
2008-07-08 00:16:26
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Yeah this poem did rhyme really well. But I really don't understand what the poem was about. For what I got this was about death. But then it might not have been.
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Posted by Dirkin
2008-07-08 01:23:26
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I felt a sense of the gothic reading this. The poem seems to be asking more philosophical questions about fate than actual people, to my mind. You rhyme like a fish swims, naturally
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Posted by garyowen
2008-07-10 01:25:00
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I'm going to show my ignorance here and guess that the 'grim reeper' has been cheated out of his due by 'suicide.' Even left guessing I can feel a music to your flow that is well pleasing to my mind.
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Posted by eternalsunshine
2008-08-01 10:51:18
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This was good, it flows well, and the rhymes work wonderfully. I really liked this stanza:

" Or has he finally found her

To steal her tired breath?

For surely he is seething

To learn she's cheated death"

The picture really adds to the overall feeling of the poem as well.
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