"It looks like it's going to rain,

Those forecasters are always a pain.

They never get it right,"

He said before I left for the night.

"The weather is unpredictable,

But I don't think it's going to give me trouble,"

I yelled, heading out the door.

But when I got on the road it started to pour.

And the serene sky opened up into         C                

                                             H      O     A                                 

                                                                     S   

Giant

                Silver

                               Crystals

                                                P

                                                   O

                                                       U

                                                            N

                                                              D

                                                           I

                                                   N

                                       G

On

                            My

            Windshield.

The 

             Wind

                               Began

H

     O

W

      L

I 

      N

G

"I'm going to make it through the storm," I whispered.  

A

Tree

           C

               R

                   A

                       S

                           H

                             E

                                 D

Onto

                     The

                                  Road, 

Inches

                      Away from

My car.

"I'm going to make it through," I whispered.

Thunder                       N

                  C          A          G

                        L             

Lightning

                L

             I

          T

                  U

                      P

                   T

             H

       E

Sky.

And then all was still.

It was the Lord's will.

The storm was done,

And out came the sun.

I had made it through the gray,

And it was a bright new day.

It was worth all the pain and sorrow,

To have a bright new tomorrow.                                                    

Keyword: poetry storm metaphor

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Comments (15)

Posted by Pilgrim 2008-07-03 19:36:08 .... Good. I like to see new ideas promoted within the realm of poetry. + Report this comment
Posted by ams 2008-07-03 19:38:29 .... i just wanted to experiment with this poem. i wanted to show the difference between choas and order. the first word in all caps is CHOAS, it kinda had some formatting issues. + Report this comment
Posted by Zombie Punk 2008-07-03 19:41:21 .... awesome poem. I like how you wrote it, way different than any poem i've ever read. i like last stanza, but the narrator wasnt watching the news! there's supposed to be a storm that day, too. oh and by the way that picture is really cool looking + Report this comment
Posted by Dirkin 2008-07-03 19:51:08 .... That was very interesting! I got what you were aiming for I think. Five for experimentation, and also for showing something I have always believed; that font, layout and formatting can have a subconscious effect on the mood of what you are reading. + Report this comment
Posted by lemon 2008-07-03 20:06:43 .... I liked the way you did the format. I think whenever someone fiddles with letter or word placement within a story or poem it should reflect the meaning of the poem. you did a great job there. I didn't think the second stanza's wording fit too well with the rhythm, but that could just be me. also: CHAOS, not CHOAS =] + Report this comment
Posted by resistanceisfreedom 2008-07-03 22:06:22 .... yes, well done. i liked how you took a different approach to describing a simple storm. + Report this comment
Posted by Amatayo 2008-07-03 23:33:58 .... THIS WAS TO SOFT THE GUY SHOULD OF DIED. NOW THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN SOMETHING. No I think the poem was great. But the way it was written took me a second to understand. + Report this comment
Posted by indianaman130 2008-07-04 13:24:23 .... AWSOME! E.E. Cummings has been reincarnated! This is what poetry is all about, playing with words and form, break the chains of the poetry system! FREE THE WORDS! + Report this comment
Posted by Something Indecent 2008-07-04 22:44:00 .... Very creative format. It made it fun to read and flowed down the page nicely. Great picture. + Report this comment
Posted by A.T.O.M. 2008-07-05 12:39:55 i agree very creative i liked that and still rhymed all the way i took me a second to adjust to how to read it but once i did i couldn't stop great poem cant wait to see more + Report this comment
Posted by r.e.potter 2008-07-06 11:51:06 .... I love a happy ending. The format made it a challenge to read,,but I got through it. Your right about those weather guys...pain in the ass, and they get paid big buck to ALWAYS get it wrong. + Report this comment
Posted by r.e.potter 2008-07-06 11:51:07 .... I love a happy ending. The format made it a challenge to read,,but I got through it. Your right about those weather guys...pain in the ass, and they get paid big buck to ALWAYS get it wrong. + Report this comment
Posted by philneale1952 2008-07-11 03:16:44 Storm Read this one a few days ago, but never got around to commenting. Nice poem and the cascading effect was new to me. Clever use of formatting. Much more readbale than others who try to be clever with words and end up confusing the matter. Liked it. + Report this comment
Posted by harmattan 2008-08-10 07:31:05 .... One of my favourite poetry books of the seventies was chocker with stuff like this, and I cannot for the life of me remember what it was called or who I gave it to. It was delightful to see the format ressurected in such an effective way. Any poem that can make re potter respond twice must be worth a second look. Can you do it again? Just don't force it. Kind regards Harmattan + Report this comment
Posted by Tarhead Mugwump 2008-08-10 08:00:28 it is a twisted style of poetry to be sure. i'll read anything that involves a creative side - just on formatting. it is a bonus when the content holds a story. write on! + Report this comment

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