Posted by soulwriter
2008-07-03 03:42:30
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Wow. The sins of the father is a pretty unique topic for a poem, and you've done it well, except maybe the inclusion of the phrase "Daft bastard" doesn't quite suit the tone of the poem, being slightly more informal than the rest.
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Posted by philneale1952
2008-07-03 03:51:32
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Well said - an apology for something you never did, and is only related to you by reason of deeds committed by a previous generation, serve only to insult the intelligence of the people intended to receive it.
We as a race need to get off this self-deprecatory horse and just get on with the job of making things safer NOW rather than beating our brows and chests over what was.
Good poem..............
Phil
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Posted by allmine
2008-07-03 08:42:55
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Awesome idea for a poem and great point of view. Rhyming flow was a little off for me, but that's cause I like to sing my poetry! But all in all a very solid effort. I liked it
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Posted by lemon
2008-07-03 11:42:55
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Good. You did a good job addressing such a touchy subject. I'd run a spellcheck though, I noticed a couple of errors, and i agree about that last line. It doesn't fit in with the rest of the poem. keep it coming =]
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Posted by Amatayo
2008-07-03 13:21:11
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So I guess this poem was about apologizing right. Well I really did not get it or maybe it is still to early for me to think. But whatever it is this is not for me.
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Posted by ams
2008-07-03 17:27:57
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ya this was a good poem. interesting topic too, i never really thought of it that way. makes us think if it is too late to repair the damage. like lemon said, run the spell check. "apoligise" should be apologize
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Posted by resistanceisfreedom
2008-07-03 21:28:57
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i liked the idea but i just think in my opinion of course, you could have delivered the idea over a bit better than what you did. but again, it's just my opinion. although i liked where you talked about the trend for today is apologizing for yesterday.
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Posted by garyowen
2008-07-03 21:32:32
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Thank you for the nice comment. I wrote this as a song but it went down like a lead balloon with the folkies. i will correct spelling.
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Posted by A.T.O.M.
2008-07-05 12:51:45
Umm.....
i didn't really get this one but maybe i can figure t out later or get it from the comments but i don't get why you put i cant apologize and said im sorry its a good poem just i didn't understand
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Posted by chaabuk
2008-07-23 19:49:43
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When I read this, I remember the saying, "you pay for the sins of your father." Makes you wonder why should that be so when in your own life you have been good. But strange are the ways of life.
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Posted by harmattan
2008-08-07 11:37:29
point of view
I know why I like you.
I used to own a St Bernard
And I talked to him often.
This is a very brave subject.I understand your comments on my stuff even better now.
I think the piece needs a little more meat, but the daft bastard part is absolutely correct, but politically incorrect of course.
I live right in the middle of all this, and I have to suspect the motives of absolutely everybody who endorses the ideas that you oppose.
Keep on, but beware the firing line of unjust accusations that you have walked into.
Kind regards.
Harmattan
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Posted by harmattan
2008-08-25 13:27:21
point of view.
I am reviewing some of my commemts
(You know why)
Don't change a word of this.
And certainly NEVER change a word like apologise to end in ZE.
Keep your ENGLISH disctionary.
Harmattan
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