My soul feels far, as if it is reaching for yours

Contact erases my memory

Content with the fact you are near to me

Your touch sends me into shock

Inhibitions from a younger me unlock

My mind in a temporary mess

If only this could remain endless

I feel nothing but you

Just you

Do you understand what you do to me?

Could you ever know?

Keyword: The Beginning

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Comments (6)

Posted by lemon 2008-07-01 13:00:36 .... Nice. You describe your feelings and your emotions very nicely. Loved the line 'My mind a temporary mess' keep it coming =] + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-07-01 14:10:59 .... I personally like punctuation, it brings emphasis to what you are trying to say. Lack of punctuation can produce a run-on sentence, which, for me, throws a poem off. However, if the run-on sentences portay your characters' personality, then so be it. + Report this comment
Posted by Kasi 2008-07-01 14:27:48 .... Ehh, poetry really doesn't need punctuation all that much, I like to separate mine with spaces, most call this the use of stanzas in a rhythmical pattern. Thus giving the poem fluidity and design almost like lyrics to a song. Either way I enjoyed it. This is a very heart-felt poem, Good Job! + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-07-01 14:31:39 .... Actually sentence structure, when conveying a point, is extremely important. Unless there is a specific, concrete idea to formulate words into a different pattern, or flow, stick with the classical use of gramatical pattern. Afterall, the specific patterns are there for a reason. + Report this comment
Posted by Dirkin 2008-07-03 20:02:40 .... This was nice, short and sweet. I dont get the title though? + Report this comment
Posted by A.T.O.M. 2008-07-05 17:28:07 well i could relate to this one really good it seems your talking about love but i could be wrong i enjoyed it good job and keep it up i know i had a hard time + Report this comment

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