Darkness, hate deep despair.

Thing's that describe this old lair.

Anger, malice and great grief.

Are what I keep on this leash.

Many times I've done wrong.

So for happiness I must long.

In this cage I will wait.

Until the warden my life does take.

Keyword: Thoughts of a prisoner

Report this story | Add to Favorites | Send to Friends | Author's Profile

No Comments posted

Comments (12)

Posted by Sad Sara 2008-06-24 23:58:09 .... Wow, talk about fookin' despondent. Err... Yer were talkin' about that right? Hehe I kid But yeah, that was definitely effective in regards to conveying hopelessness. Well done 'Anna + Report this comment
Posted by Dirkin 2008-06-25 00:38:00 .... I think that would be what a prisoner would feel. Good job + Report this comment
Posted by Xena 2008-06-25 01:57:39 err i actually dont think thats what a prisoner would think.. i think a prisoner would think.. mothafucka fmothafucka ima gonna shank yo ass mofucka im gonna rape yo ass mofacka....shit.. or i hope dis mofucka dont shank ma ass.. or.. i hope dis nigga dont rape my ass... maybe you should write a poem about that.. hehe + Report this comment
Posted by flossy 2008-06-25 10:44:49 .... Another useless comment brought to you by Xena. Liked it, short but not sweet.Well done. + Report this comment
Posted by flossy 2008-06-25 10:46:37 .... I think someone's messin around with your ratings again.Very sad.They should do away with the ratings.They mean sh@t.All that matters is the comments.This deserves more than a 3. + Report this comment
Posted by lemon 2008-06-25 11:59:43 .... I thought it was good. it was emotional and I liked how you described the feeling of no hope. =] + Report this comment
Posted by Writer Extrodinaire 2008-06-25 12:04:58 Okay wait if hes keeping anger,malice and grief on a leash then why doesn't he have happiness + Report this comment
Posted by ams 2008-06-25 12:24:30 .... i thought it was a decent poem, a little on the short side though. i thought that the whole poem could be taken as an extended metaphor, where the person is a prisoner of themself rather than an actual prisoner. and Xena's comment makes absolutley no sense, but that isnt surprising. sorry to hear that someone is messing with your ratings + Report this comment
Posted by Zombie Punk 2008-06-25 13:48:03 .... I enjoyed your poem and i think you did a good job on it i usually dont like xenas comments but that one was fookin hilarious + Report this comment
Posted by Amatayo 2008-06-25 14:21:39 To funny A don't get on Xena to much cause she had me rollin with here comment. I don't care if some one is messin with my ratings because I know people who like it so "its whatever." And to writer extrodinaire the reason he does not have happiness is because he has those on a leash. meaning that they are connected to him. And any one who has questions just post. + Report this comment
Posted by The Dark Advenger 2008-06-25 16:13:03 .... Nice this does sound at least to me what a prisoner who was on death row would say. + Report this comment
Posted by Pilgrim 2008-07-04 17:22:21 .... This is not your best work, however, I've spent time in solitary confinement so I can relate to the feelings within the poem. + Report this comment

Post a comment

Post a comment