"Are you still mad at me? You sound so cold," he asked me.

"Well, why ask? Do you care?"---a moment of silence--- "I mean, would it matter to you?" I typed with fervor, consumed by my anger.

"Of course it does. I wouldn't ask if it doesn't." He sounded sincere. Sounded, yes. But I still doubt him. After what he's done. Yes, I may have forgiven him. But the scar remains and like what happens when there is keloid formation in a vessel lumen---obstruction, restriction to liberal flow of fluids---something's holding me back. I cannot allow it to happen again.

I've been such a fool for falling, getting caught up in his trap. I acted like an innocent girl who allowed herself to be stupefied by a beast-in-disguise. I was so naive; he made me believe what Disney wants little princesses to dream about---that prince charmings are real and knights-in-shining-armors exist. Well, yes---in DREAMS, they do. 

"Weren't you the one who told me to be careful 'coz 'the world is full of fake people?' How'd I know if you're sincere?" I replied. Now, I understand. Almost convinced that everything was a joke. I never thought he's been kidding me all along. I was silly to believe that he's the guy for me. I was such a fool for putting my defenses down, for allowing him to reap into my subconscious. I made a laughingstock out of myself. I feel so defeated . . . so alienated . . . What've I done to deserve this?

He didn't reply. So I had to answer my own question, "I'd never know. Believing you is like a gamble. Winning is uncertain. Losing is a huge probability. If I win, I am lucky. If I lose, at least I am a good sport." 

Keyword: fancy fantasy hazel online stories love

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Comments (11)

Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-12 05:32:49 hope to hear comments from you... please feel free to share comments about this one... it's a true story... i would be very glad to hear your opinion. + Report this comment
Posted by Vango 2008-04-12 13:35:20 .... Great read. + Report this comment
Posted by Roadkill315 2008-04-12 15:29:37 .... Short but thoughtful. Relationships often are too. + Report this comment
Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-13 05:40:00 thanks... thanks Vango... ur comment gives me a lift... + Report this comment
Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-13 05:52:07 thanks... thanks for spending time reading this one... and for sharing a piece of ur mind... yah, some relationships indeed are, like this one... short but thoughtful, and painful... + Report this comment
Posted by SageSyren 2008-04-21 12:44:24 .... Even being married I still feel like this lot of the time. Sorry this happened to you. Made for a great short story though. + Report this comment
Posted by Tarhead Mugwump 2008-04-21 12:52:03 fancy fantasy nice title... truth is, it happens. truth is, it might happen again. truth is, you have to enter into the next relationship with the same openness, trust, and innocence. truth is, carried baggage will destroy your future relationships. truth is, paying attention helps. truth is, paying attention means nothing when a person is in love. truth is, the truth... hang in there, every closing door opens another... + Report this comment
Posted by lorislittlesecret 2008-04-21 12:56:24 .... It hurts but it is necessary....unfortunately. Doesn't make it hurt any less the next time, but you have to open up.... + Report this comment
Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-24 04:19:52 .... laugh out loud... if it hadn't happened perhaps won't be able to write my first short... thanks for the comment... really made me crack out loud... + Report this comment
Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-24 04:26:57 .... truth is, there is always hope... thanks Tarhead... i'l surely take that as a good advice... + Report this comment
Posted by hazeleyes 2008-04-24 04:32:28 .... thanks lorislittlesecret... feels great to hear ur thougths about this one... yah, i think ought to know how it feels like... + Report this comment

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