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I’m 18 and I haven’t even had a boyfriend. I haven’t even had a first kiss. How lame am I. This man comes over to measure our house because of a hailstorm. He had this apprentice. I could never forget him. He was probably only a couple years older than me. He was tall with dark hair, hazel eyes and a well-toned body. But because of my shyness I didn’t even say hello to him. Anyway my dad would have given me a speech about talking to boys. I’m 18 I can go out to clubs and drink but I’m not allowed to communicate with boys. What do you see wrong with the picture?

Ever since I could remember I was a shy thing. I never really had that mush friends. But I really never wanted heaps of friends. I had one good friend for all of my primary school. She was the schools reject in a way. So naturally me being her friend made me a reject as well. I didn’t care as long as I had my best friend along side with me.

There would always be one boy that tormented me. Once he got started pretty much the whole school started up. They called me names like freckle fart from Kmart or loser or reject. If a keep on going there would be nothing but names. So at the end of year six a got even with him. And I forgot to mention that he constantly threw balls at me. At the end of the year I approached him and punched his nose in. Then he takes a swing at me and I jump onto his back and start going wild. The anger inside me just came to the surface and blew up. In the end he had a broken nose and a bit of his ear bitten off.

High school was a different story. It all started at the year seven camp. Before I knew it we had formed a small group of at least five. We called ourselves the school rejects. Their other group rejected everyone that was in our group. People would often come and go but the five of us always stayed together. It also didn’t help that we were in an all girl school.

I’ve never told anyone this. But since I’m spilling my guts here I might as well. Throughout high school I developed a crush with my best friend. I was confused about my sexuality. Then I hear that she had recently broken up with her girlfriend (this is year ten). After a year I muster up the courage to ask her out only for her to reject me. She had found another girlfriend that lived two hours away. By the way she met on Internet chat. So I was pretty much crushed that she would pick a total stranger over a friend that had been there for her. I mean I helped her through the tough times. She didn’t even know the girl then. But I pushed it aside there was no point of jeopardizing a friendship because the heart says I love you. 

When year twelve hit I got a girlfriend. She was wonderful. No one knew about her. I didn’t want my parents to know because I didn’t know how they would react. But my brother ended up finding out and he was ok with it all. He would take me to dates with her. We always had each other in stitches. What are the chances of finding a person that has the same sense of morbid humor as you?

Then it went all down hill. Her parents were moving to another state. I was depressed for weeks. My parents never knew why though. We would talk on the phone but that wasn’t the same. So we both agreed that we should break up. I could literally feel my heart tear into tiny pieces. It was like a bomb struck me. I fell in love to easily.

So through my entire child hood I pretty much never interacted with the opposite sex. Besides that one incident when I was in year six. I didn’t know how to talk to a boy. You could imagine my reaction when I saw this guy. Instant shy mode. I kept my eyes on the ground and fidgeted with my hands. Pathetic I know. But now I kind of regret not talking to him. I told my sister about him. She went ballistic at me. By the way she’s only twelve and she has a boyfriend of three years. And I think that she even had her first kiss, but she won’t own up to it.

Well that’s pretty much all of my love life. Not much of one. I can’t do much about it now it’s all in the past. I do wish I could turn back time and do things differently. But there are things that I would definitely keep the same.

-this is a true story about me-

Keyword: shyness and love

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Comments (7)

Posted by thirteen 2008-04-01 15:48:04 .... addictive story.Grand job. + Report this comment
Posted by R.E.Potter 2008-04-01 15:56:12 ,,, lot of life a head of you my dear. + Report this comment
Posted by Vango 2008-04-01 16:05:20 .... I enjoyed this very much. It's strange in how it sounds so familiar. + Report this comment
Posted by Tarhead Mugwump 2008-04-01 16:40:48 you know what? people are not all they are pumped up to be... I do know this, love is impulsive - it does not care if you are shy or outgoing. it goes where it wants and does whatever it feels... patience, as sir potter said - you've got time. + Report this comment
Posted by billyboy 2008-04-02 03:53:18 .... If that really is a true story, then I say remember you're still only 18. Heaps of time. Think positive, think beautiful and that's how you will be perceived. Good luck. Looking back, I see this was published on April Ist. Have you sucked us all in?? + Report this comment
Posted by deadfamilytree 2008-04-02 14:11:09 .... lol i didnt even realize that...but this is a true story about me and i hav now heard that mum is devorsing dad n i hav a choice to go with her or dad. to tell the truth i dont want to go with niether either way ill be miserable. n ty for the comments they have opened a new door for me + Report this comment
Posted by resistanceisfreedom 2008-04-05 21:51:32 .... a powerful account of life. i agree with everyone else though and i'm sure you have gotten sick of hearing it and maybe you dont even believe it anymore but you do still have alot of time. dont beat yourself up too hard. i admire this. + Report this comment

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