Awakening of Minds (part one)

So there I was, looking once more at the device...

Love Ends

The sun rose serenely over the pond, changing the...

Heroes
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Written by Nate Stanford   
Wednesday, 12 March 2008
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heroes run through the streets of the city
saving lives, yet they recieve no pity
they make themselves victims of our disaster
for them, earth is their pastor
for us, it is a childrens toy, wearing with use
but they stay patient, even after constant abuse
and when we cease to stay afloat
we call for their help, their hearts they devote
they try their hardest, but if they fail
we plunge into the deep vale
we never forgive them for their unsuccessful attempt
and instead of thanks, we show contempt
they are the true heroes, whom we dont know
and we remain ignorant as they come and go

Copyright 2008 Nate Stanford
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Comments (4)
Posted by gsaracen
2008-03-12 22:16:55
....

I like it! simple and good! great.

Some other general tips you can use in poetry:

non-literalism (similes, metaphors, irony etc etc ect)

synesthesia (like...mixing up the senses... )

line or verse structure that "sounds" nice... because of flow and rythm...like maybe a palindrome like structure... or a line that sounds quick and snappy or longish as we want it to...

good stuff!
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Posted by gsaracen
2008-03-12 22:36:25
PLUS

the best way to write good poetry is to read a lot of poetry! of diff types too... don't restrict yourself:

literary stuff....modern stuff.... old stuff.... gritty stuff.... archaic stuff.... high vocab... low vocab.... limerick...sonnet.... fancy-pants.... blue-collar...

ist alle gut!
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Posted by nick711
2008-03-13 13:03:55
....

Thanks for the advice, again, gsaracen. You've been really helpful. I hope that the rhyming worked out OK this time, because I never really tried it.
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Posted by lorislittlesecret
2008-05-21 09:39:18
....

Rhyming in poems is hard, but you did a decent job here
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