Posted by nick711 2008-03-12 14:58:06 great!
great! has rythm and a good flow. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by nick711 2008-03-12 14:58:58 ....
Thanks + Report this comment |  |
Posted by gsaracen 2008-03-12 15:01:17 sorry
that was me above. ID switch.
Admins, I actually had edit/delete permission on this user's poem, that is a serious and HUGE security breach. Basically I am relying on the goodwill of my fellow users not to trash my account if they are accidentally logged into my account. Please DO something? + Report this comment |  |
Posted by gsaracen 2008-03-12 15:03:29 you talk to yourself?
Well...yer a poet.... what can I expect. ;) + Report this comment |  |
Posted by R.E.Potter 2008-03-12 15:36:02 ,,,
good poem with meaning. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by gsaracen 2008-03-12 15:57:31 I agree
has meaning. meaning that most humans can agree with or understand.
Not just random or pretencious. keep it up!! + Report this comment |  |
Posted by nick711 2008-03-12 16:02:54 Thanks
Thanks everybody.
Do you have any advice for future poems? + Report this comment |  |
Posted by R.E.Potter 2008-03-12 16:07:15 ,,,
for one...nothing explicit ...lol + Report this comment |  |
Posted by gsaracen 2008-03-12 16:19:48 ....
there's a thread in the forum on the explicit issue... some guideline suggestions posted there too....
Yeah advice... the thing about poetry is it is 50% message and 50% form. (in my view...)
So flow, rythm, rhyme (if you want), and the "feel" of a verse really matters.
Sometimes you can delay a point or line you want to put in and put it in later... to achieve a rhyme in the "near term"... you dig?
A thesaurus can help LOADS with poetry. try thesaurus.com
This is just my gen advice I give to myself. your poem was not lacking. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by nick711 2008-03-12 16:58:32 ....
Thanks for the help. I actually just wrote another one with your advice in mind. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by celtic1888 2008-03-13 10:39:31 Very good
I really enjoyed that evfen if I dont know much about poetry. I found it sad but full of hope, well done. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by Dirkin 2008-03-15 00:50:34 ....
very good + Report this comment |  |
Posted by extinct kiddo 2008-03-16 13:59:32 Wow.
Nice poem.
It's very popular.
Keep writing. (: + Report this comment |  |
Posted by E.Dover 2008-03-17 16:28:09 ....
No offense, but I didn't like it at all. + Report this comment |  |
Posted by nick711 2008-03-17 19:15:28 ....
ouch. + Report this comment |  |