Posted by rock2003
2008-01-02 21:41:20
Good use of Time and Space
I like the way the reader is set up for something unexpected. That is important for good poetry: something contrary to cliche. I think this poem does it by breaking the cliche. We don't normally think of a grown woman riding a bike over a child's playing space. Super poem.
+ Report this comment |  |
Posted by dockyard
2008-01-03 17:23:12
....
:)
+ Report this comment |  |
Posted by Zombie Punk
2008-08-07 11:12:56
....
Well, that was cetainly not what I was expecting!
This was a really cool Poem. I really like the second and third line but then again every like was fantastic.
Great work!
+ Report this comment |  |
Posted by ams
2008-08-07 11:19:50
....
i liked this, it was interesting. i liked the imagery portrayed in the first few lines, about the grown woman riding her bike. i also thought the format was interesting, although i had to read the poem a couple of times because of the lack of punctuation.
+ Report this comment |  |
Posted by dockyard
2008-08-07 16:18:58
....
yes, the lack of punctuation is confusing for most people. but its supposed to all be one thought, and i feel like when i use periods it disrupts that. in this poem i rely heavily on linebreaks for pauses as opposed to the more conventional comma
+ Report this comment | |
Posted by Pilgrim
2008-09-07 13:23:47
....
Interesting.
Seems like flash poetry, but I could be wrong.
I got this one more than your others so far.
Pretty good.
+ Report this comment |  |
via Email