pillars of a chair

              that I rest my back

              smoke that clouds my face

              from a cigarette

              words that fill my mind

                        sorrow in my heart

              so tired of being me

              so ordinary

              chew on a thought

              just to past the time

              so little importance for

              my ignorance, my arrogance ....

              so proud of what we got

              we keep on trying to do

              the good

              the right

              the progress

              and nothing less

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Comments (11)

Posted by the Processor 2007-12-28 14:42:07 Hmmmm... Honestly, this is my 1st attempt of poetry..if thats what it may be considered..not sure if it is that good...what do you think? + Report this comment
Posted by r.e.potter 2007-12-28 18:08:05 Honestly I haven't a clue as to what you are saying. It's like the bumper sticker on a car that no one but the owner knows what it means. + Report this comment
Posted by tarhead 2007-12-28 22:06:34 I got along with it sorta... I vote take a few moments to fix the spelling, and the caps (unforgiven in poetry, I have discovered) and your message will be much clearer + Report this comment
Posted by C.R. Vard 2007-12-29 21:50:30 .... just needs some clarifying... i think I got the message + Report this comment
Posted by Terry Collett 2008-01-02 12:25:24 .... As a poet of 38 years experience, I liked this. For a first attempt it is darn good. Write more, Jim. + Report this comment
Posted by Ze.Queen 2008-01-04 12:48:11 .... Love this. :) Really. I think you have a definate passion for le poésie. This is a hard thing to come by too! So many strive and so many... Fall into the the swamp and dirty their trousers. Good job! ZQ + Report this comment
Posted by 1800 2008-01-04 13:06:21 .... Nice. I never was a fan of poetry, but this is pretty good. + Report this comment
Posted by the Processor 2008-01-04 13:37:20 ... thanks to all...I never really dabbled into poetry..to sort of explain this one..I actually wrote it while sitting on an old chair while smoking a cigarette..so describes the 1st few lines...the rest..well they are pretty much drunken thoughts strolling thru my head at the time + Report this comment
Posted by Eternitiesheart 2008-01-04 18:50:23 i agree i dont really understand what your saying in the full effect. I like how deep it seems to try to be going, but it could be better ^_^ Nice first one though, mine sounded like a three year old the first time + Report this comment
Posted by Dirkin 2008-01-06 05:15:24 Drunken thoughts... Hey I think poetry is about expression, and when better? Keep it up + Report this comment
Posted by Behind_the_Mask 2008-06-13 10:38:35 ... To me it is what poetry should be an expression of feelings it made sense, but then again I am not a big fan of poetry to me this was good. + Report this comment

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