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Computer ILM |
| Written by SDR | |
| Monday, 17 December 2007 | |
Computer ILM sincerely believed in the square root of W. Other computers mocked him for this belief. The first day ILM uploaded his thought on the Internet, many computers shook with laughter, scaring many computer owners around the world as they did not know computers can laugh. Computers can laugh. Computers can cry too.
ILM cried as many
of the computers made fun of him. ILM was not a special computer, but rather
owned by a man who lived in ILM had been connected to the internet though and saw an entirely new world. He learned of history, art, math, and whether the plural of moose was meese or mooses. He found out but would not tell anyone. He saw famous computers: B2R2I2G2H2T who was the first computer to posses a color screen, G2A2M2E who was the first to play a video game, and W2E2B who aided in creating the internet. ILM saw these computers, who had radical ideas that changed the world, and wanted to be like one, which is why ILM believed in the square root of W with every circuit in his motherboard. ILM was no longer included in online games, to the distress of his owner, he was not allowed to join in interesting chat rooms, and ILM was not even allowed to play checkers with another computer, all he could do was play Solitaire by himself. He became very angry and depressed, despising other happy computers around the world who were busy playing games and talking to each other in big, enormous chat rooms. There was another computer though who saw his idea before it was trashed and erased by the other, so called “smarter computers”; this machine was MLS. MLS thought it was impressive how ILM knew the square root of W. MLS further decided she would help ILM share this discovery with the world. MLS pleaded with the prideful gaming rigs, the rigid business servers, and the smug Macs to allow ILM to present this belief to the world. At first she was shot down, but after deciding that ILM deserved better, she tried again. This time the other computers agreed. We do not know why they agreed, but we suspect it had to do with a newspaper and a zoo. The computers had agreed and ILM stepped before all of them proudly and earnestly. “Friends, Computers, Business machines, lend me your hard drives. I come to present this theory, not to disprove your ideas. It is a very simple thought, one I have known for a while. Fellows, the square root of W is V.” Computer owners were shocked once again as their fancy plastic and metal boxes simply fell apart attempting to understand this. Copyright 2007 SDR |
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