Blue Room *authors note: hope everyone stilll likes it. i... Ken Masters News A Special Report Brought to you by Ken...

Report a comment Thank you for taking the time to report the following comment to the administrator of this site. Please complete this short form and click the submit button to process your report. Name   E-mail   Reason for reporting comment       Comment in question Posted by jcox21 08-09-2007 06:42,   ... I have little doubt that you have potential as a writer after reviewing this work. I enjoyed several of your comparisons and descriptions, and I like your title a lot. As for the stuff I didn't like, first of all it was too short - only about a grand in my word count. Use your imagination and triple that number at least. I know it's a short story, but you shoot out the information about the history of the room too fast. And it is kind of tough to follow, the other comments were right about that. Read it over again several times and comb through it with as much of a first time readers perspective as you can. Maybe put the story away for a week or two and look at it with fresh eyes. My main advice is to work with the theme and make it more interesting because the bad/evil/mysterious hotel bit has been used many times. Personally I would make the main character special in some way, perhaps in his abilities or profession. You could do anything with it of course. Maybe he's an investigative priest sent from the Vatican who knows. Good luck and keep at it.   » Report this comment to administrator   »  Go back to the story