Report a comment Thank you for taking the time to report the following comment to the administrator of this site. Please complete this short form and click the submit button to process your report. Name   E-mail   Reason for reporting comment       Comment in question Posted by Mokusa 07-17-2008 21:50,   ... I'd have to say what they said about the ending feeling out of place. I think maybe if there was some foreshadowing or something to tie the end more to the story it would work.   Ray Bradbury wrote a fantastic short story called "the Small Assassin" about a killer toddler that like your story would be really hard to digest but he took the time to build suspense and give hints and work in irony.   This isn't a bad idea I just think you rushed to quickly to the payoff.   » Report this comment to administrator   »  Go back to the story