Report a comment Thank you for taking the time to report the following comment to the administrator of this site. Please complete this short form and click the submit button to process your report. Name   E-mail   Reason for reporting comment       Comment in question Posted by cookingWine 05-20-2008 11:38,   ... The vodka and coke is a strange drink.    You need to take a class in grammar. One piece of advice: read your story out loud to yourself and edit it like that. Where it is longwinded, look to cut sentences or break with a comma. You shouldn't have to breath again before you finish a sentence or it's too long.  Commas can alleviate that along with dividing sentences.    The dialogue was beyond cheesy. If your friends and you talk like that you need to find new friends because that is the definition of boring chatter.    Don't always start paragraphs with dialogue. It makes for a tough read.    I didn't like it. I like the idea of the ten things list but they aren't interesting things.    You need to find a way to make it yours instead of writing it for someone else, because that's the omnipresent feeling that came with it.   » Report this comment to administrator   »  Go back to the story