A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband's best friend.
They make love for hours and, afterwards, while they're just lying there, the phone rings. Since it's the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. The best friend listens, only hearing her side of the conversation:

"Hello? Oh, hi... I'm so glad that you called... Really? That's wonderful.... Well, I'm happy to hear you're having such a great time... Oh, that sounds terrific... Thanks. Okay. Bye bye."

She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?"

"Oh" she replies, "That was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."

lol that one was funny

I got that one off of comedycentral.com . they have some pretty funny jokes there

A bank robber goes into a bank a claims "THIS IS A STICK-UP." While doing so, his mask falls from his face for a split second. He turns to one of the customers on his right side and ask "Did you see my face? The guy says "yes, I did" The robber takes out his gun and shoots him in dead in the head. He then turns to a guy on his left and ask "Did you see my face? "No," he says, "but my wife did"

lol potter. i saw something similar on robot chicken it always makes me laugh

Hey, guess what? I'm resuscitating the thread!


A pedophile and a little kid are walking through a dark forest. The kid turns to the pedophile and says "I'm scared."
The pedophile says, "You're scared? I've got to walk out of here alone!"


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Little Sara was in the garden filling up a hole in the dirt, when her neighbor peered over the fence.

Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you doing there, Sara?"

"My goldfish died," replied Sara tearfully, without looking up, "and I just buried him."

The neighbor was very concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Sara patted down the last heap of dirt then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."

The first one is just wrong...and I think Jessie told me that one before...hahahaha

The second one is funny. I wish I knew some jokes, well I do, but I don't know if they would be considered offensive...