that's what guns are for

And not just any guns, but Machinengewhers!

tarhead's a tank...i'm buying me a RPG

RPG? Do you mean RPG-2, RPG-7, or RPG-29?

If he is indeed a tank, I'd probably use three Panzerfaust 60s.

maybe i'll just take the SRAW

"hey wally..."
"yeah beav?"
"well gee wally, why do those guys keep taking tarheads crown?"
"golly beav, I don't know. dad says they might just be a bunch of kooks."
"yeah, you're probably right wally."

moments pass.

"hey, wally."
"yeah beav?"
"do you think those guys know that tarhead has a ion cannon and is working on a particle beam gun?"
"golly beav, I wonder if they do.."
"they sure will be surprised - huh wally."
"yeah beav, they sure will."

moments pass

"well, good night wally."
"good night beav"

I think I will take that crown back now - thank you.

good thing no one cares about the president...maybe i can borrow his security detail.