Lily Qwert (novel.idea) Profile Page
Lily Qwert (novel.idea)
Hits 632
Online Status OFFLINE
Member Since 06/13/2008
Last Online 09/19/2008
Connections 5
Avg Profile Rating
 

Stories



This user has no published stories.

Comments

Total number of comments: 28

Title article: Dragonslayer, Chapter 1
Date: 2008-08-28 17:42:51
Good start
I am very interested as to what will happen next. 
"eves hate to not help people" I think that you meant elves. You also spelled laughter wrong at the beginning of the fifth paragraph. 
I think that it started out very well.

Title article: The coast
Date: 2008-08-23 19:24:35

I really liked this poem and I too liked your rhyming. 
I don't understand the line 'I would be happy that it is me it saves.' could you explain that?

Title article: A peom 4th (As they come i hide)
Date: 2008-08-18 15:09:57

The first line doesn't make sense to me. It looks to me like you were trying to rhyme so you added in the word night on the end. 
I think that you need to read it again and fix some of your grammar mistakes. I also think that you shouldn't have used the number 2 you should have written out the word two. It just doesn't look right. 
It might have been a good poem but I'm not quite sure that I understand it enough to say.

Title article: A Foot in the Door - Conclusion, Chapter 2
Date: 2008-08-14 09:30:32

I like how in the first one you described the picture. I never would have known what it was. 
I'd really like to know, if David didn't kill the guy, who did?

Title article: Head Tree
Date: 2008-08-13 16:02:49

The story didn't make much sense to me. 
And he obviously couldn't cut the tree down since he couldn't kill himself because he didn't have anything sharp.

Title article: The Dragon
Date: 2008-08-13 15:39:47

I like your poem but I don't understand how 'But the dragon it got her And took her true love away'. If it got her why didn't it take her away? 
I really like the poem though.

Title article: Mirror, Mirror, Chapter 3
Date: 2008-07-20 20:18:05

I like the story but I would really like to know what is inside the mirror. Is there a whole world in there or just one room? 
Also, I don't think you should put part of the last chapter at the beginning of the next. The chapters are all together so if I forget something I can just go back and look.

Title article: Mr.Silver. Bellhop on 4th street Part2 (A story of bad grammar!)!
Date: 2008-07-07 17:57:22

How does Mr. Silver know who the Blood Clan members are? 
And why doesn't Mr. Patts fire Silver for killing all his customers?

Title article: Mr.Silver. Bellhop on 4th street (A story of bad grammar!)!
Date: 2008-07-07 17:48:52

Business man man needs a name; unless Business man man is his name in which case it should be Business Man Man. But I think that it is much too long and confusing to read every time.

Title article: A peom 13th or is it 15th? oh well it's another peom!
Date: 2008-06-29 13:26:26

I can't say that it inspired me in any way but I think that I understand what you are trying to say. 
It's your thirteenth poem. You really should stop numbering them though. You should have put Cloud Watching as the name.

<< Start < Prev [1] 2 3 Next > End >>

Forum

This user has no forum posts.

Connection

Lily Qwert (novel.idea)'s connections

OFFLINE Robyn Taylor (rtvols344)
OFFLINE Evan Dover (E.Dover)
OFFLINE ~Fletcher Emo Screamo ~ (ThatPsycoArtistFletcher10)
OFFLINE Emily (screamfordonkeys)
OFFLINE Gwyn (Darkness.of.Mystery)
 

Guestbook


Name Entry
Philip Neale (philneale1952)

Derbyshire, England
 Created On: 07/21/2008 00:47:47
Good Morning. Thank for the comments on Mirror...........I like to tease, that's why the 'lead-ins' and end of chapter 'coming soons' are there.

Phil
~Fletcher Emo Screamo ~ (ThatPsycoArtistFletcher10)

 Created On: 06/13/2008 14:31:35
Hey i dont know you...
but i like your stuff and you kept adding me so i guess i added you...

Pictures

Picture/Images uploaded by the member



No Items published in this profile gallery