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Tom Shandruk (Tom Shandruk) Profile Page
Tom Shandruk (Tom Shandruk)
Hits 2146
Online Status OFFLINE
Member Since 04/07/2007
Last Online 09/06/2008
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Website/Blog: www.myspace.com/jewinashoe
About Myself: Well, just go to my myspace and add me as a friend!

Stories


Published Short Stories

 
DateTitleCategoryHits
Aug 2, 2008Derman - Well-Spoken Englishman, Chapter 1Mystery 83
Jul 22, 2008Flowers on the WallPoetry 159
Jun 14, 2008Escaping the WallsPoetry 111
May 3, 2008Life is GrandPoetry 107
Feb 23, 2008UmbrellaMiscellaneous Stories 246
Jan 31, 2008DripPoetry 192
Jan 25, 2008UnspokenPoetry 252
Apr 7, 2007DrunkMiscellaneous Stories 1615

Comments

Total number of comments: 42

Title article: OBAMA
Date: 2008-08-02 18:24:37

Frankly, I thought this was very poorly done. The poem doesn't try to get a message across to the reader, nor does it make a point, nor, for that matter, does it even make sense!  
 
Seriously, work on using better words. I have a feeling you simply Googled "Words that end with -ama" and threw them in there, or something along those lines. One star, simply because of the awesome picture.

Title article: Frantic, Chapter 1
Date: 2008-07-25 00:36:31

That's a damn fine chapter you have there. This is my favorite area to write in (psych), and I could never write a full-fledged story this well! Very well done, you have my 5 :D

Title article: Flowers on the Wall
Date: 2008-07-22 21:24:29

I've just started reading the Bible, and I didn't have that in mind when I wrote this. I did, however, have a general idea of temptation and how it can look or actually be harmless, yet can be a part of a larger evil. That's where the flowers come in. The flowers themselves are beautiful. It was the vines that blocked the light, exit, and choked him, and unfortunately the vines are connected to the flowers.

Title article: Frustration
Date: 2008-07-22 19:45:53
Great Job
This was done very well. I especially liked the choice of font.  
 
You conveyed the feeling of pure frustration very well, with universal wording that can apply the feeling in any context. I really like this; Good job :)

Title article: Flowers on the Wall
Date: 2008-07-22 14:08:30
Thanks everyone
I wrote this literally 20 minutes before it was published on here. I was really tired, and was humming "Riders on the Storm", when the words "Flowers on the wall" came into my head. I did what I usually do; I let my mind type out the poem with me as a passenger. 
 
Basically, the flowers are like temptation in that they look pleasing, but soon the vines cover up everything. Kinda a little trippy symbol for how an addiction goes from "Just this one time" to "I can stop when I want" to a full-fledged consumption.  
 
Yahweh is the Hebrew word for God, used in respect for the Lord by not calling him by his name. I figured a bunch of "Oh Lords" would get kinda boring.  
 
Whew. I hope that cleared up any questions, and allows everyone to get a better experience from this.

Title article: Escaping the Walls
Date: 2008-07-10 18:21:58

not really off base, just the "secret" is more of the "behind closed doors" type than "billy picks his nose" type. But yeah, the acceptance thing is there, but I'm aiming for someone who can accept the situation I'm in, and not treat me any differently than they already do (specifically a close friend, the "one" in the poem).

Title article: To Her Whom Cancer Took
Date: 2008-07-10 18:16:56

Man, cancer is a subject that always makes me tear up, and this poem was no exception. I've lost my Grandfather, Aunt, and various extended family members to cancer, and gone through all the pain and emotion. This is by far the best poem concerning a loss I've ever read, and I came to that conclusion before I realized what the sides read. 
 
And to previous posters, the word is actually "Lo," which means to show surprise or attract attention, not a typo or cut-off.

Title article: Escaping the Walls
Date: 2008-07-05 22:01:07

Ha I wrote this about myself, all from personal and current experience. I'm not mentally ill, the way I see it (yet) but it does take a toll. Thanks for the comment :)

Title article: Don't put me in the same box
Date: 2008-06-29 23:44:54
Totally with you!
I really connect with this. Way to go!

Title article: Betrayed by a friend
Date: 2008-06-25 00:52:03

because of the comment in the beginning, I suppose this is about a good friend of yours that was the same sex. It seems he simply turned away from you, or did something to destroy your friendship. I like the dark feelings at the end, but overall the poem was....almost lacking in a plot, if that can be applied to poetry. It's all too vague, if you understand what I'm saying.

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