gone was the girl

gone was the girl once innocent of love, heartaches...

Birth of the White Buffalo

The bell hanging from the handle of the door rang,...
Patrick O. (Roadkill315) Profile Page
Patrick O. (Roadkill315)
Hits 2832
Online Status OFFLINE
Last Online 07/04/2008
Connections 15
Avg Profile Rating
 
About Myself: My interests are my marriage, our 4 kids, writing, fishing, golf, nascar, fantasy sports, chess, travel, my hot sauce collection now at 255 bottles and growing, and food that is very hot and spicy enjoyed with cold Labatts.

Stories


Published Short Stories

 
DateTitleCategoryHits
Apr 10, 2008Alternative Gaye CallingMiscellaneous Stories 163
Apr 3, 2008Rouge's Realm Revealed (Chapter One)Science Fiction 141
Apr 2, 2008Manifest ThirstAdventure 394

Forum


Last 10 Forum Posts
DateSubjectCategoryHits
04/16/2008 14:27:37Re:BlockheadOff-Topic643
04/06/2008 19:42:56Re:Suggestions for siteOff-Topic941
04/05/2008 19:57:50Re:The score to your short stories?Off-Topic1876
04/05/2008 19:21:07Re:The score to your short stories?Off-Topic1876
04/05/2008 19:17:08Re:Best War Novel?Off-Topic1228
04/05/2008 19:04:57Re:The 13th.Off-Topic5692
04/05/2008 17:21:36Re:Question on this Site?Off-Topic568
04/04/2008 14:25:18Re:I'm A Stranger Here MyselfOff-Topic1099
04/04/2008 14:19:12Re:race to 500Off-Topic752
04/04/2008 14:17:19Re:Best War Novel?Off-Topic1228

Connection

Patrick O. (Roadkill315)'s connections

OFFLINE JS Brown (Crazy Scott)
OFFLINE Anna DeVine (Sad Sara)
OFFLINE b.k. (b.k.)
OFFLINE Jutta Motrin (Juttabell^^)
OFFLINE Terry Collett (Terry Collett)
OFFLINE Mugen (Dirkin)
OFFLINE Thomas Reynolds (ThomasP3)
OFFLINE Alamo St-Jean (The_Gimp)
OFFLINE Robert Quintin Penn (1800)
OFFLINE Christian Wright (The 13th)
 
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Guestbook


Name Entry
R.E.Potter (R.E.Potter)
This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it 		Created On: 04/14/2008 19:44:54
enjoy reading your work.

Christian Wright (The 13th)

Dublin Land
 Created On: 04/14/2008 09:41:52
Like the new profile pic.
Keep writing and goodluck.
Thomas Reynolds (ThomasP3)

The Garden State
 Created On: 04/04/2008 12:48:35
Hi, Thanks for commenting on both of my stories, I really do appreciate the feed back! Just hopping around to introduce myself. There is a ton of stuff on this site.
Lori Branson (lorislittlesecret)

New Braunfels, TX
 Created On: 04/04/2008 08:15:03
Just stopping by to say I am glad that you are joining in a lot more lately...
Nunyo Bidness (cookingWine)

 Created On: 03/13/2008 18:40:25
Don't know if you write any, but I catch your comments around on other people stories and they're usually pretty good.
I'd like to see a story or something of yours.
Feedback from Patrick O. (Roadkill315): HI, thanks for the note in my guestbook, I have recently posted a couple of stories, would love your review. Thanks

Comments

Title article: The Girl In The Blue Dress
Date: 2008-04-10 15:40:35

Nice exchange between characters... The ending was certainly worth the time to read.

Title article: The Politician
Date: 2008-04-10 15:38:48

Very nice. I'll share it with some political junky friends of mine; tell then this dude Nate Stanford captured what we debate for hours into a poem. Now, can you write one that captures the essence of what the winner does with his time during those next four years?

Title article: One cut too many
Date: 2008-04-10 15:34:08

trying to end my day on a high note, and I read this. I'll take my high from acknowledging that you have poetic talent.

Title article: THE EMPTY CHAIR
Date: 2008-04-10 15:32:18

heart string plucker this one is, gotta go home and hug my girl now.

Title article: Inevitable Departure
Date: 2008-04-10 15:30:58

yuck, suicide, not my fave subjetc to read of but you did a good job getting the emotion of it into this poem.

Title article: first poem...so bare with me
Date: 2008-04-10 15:29:31

Agree agree, well written indeed.

Title article: Addict
Date: 2008-04-10 15:27:27

Awesome poem b.k.... a kid whole experiences this for real just need to print this out and hand it to their drug using parent to make their point.

Title article: Breaking Point
Date: 2008-04-10 15:23:32

sad indeed, good job conveying it!

Title article: Is this love?
Date: 2008-04-10 15:20:54
IIIIIIII
Whew, all but one, or was it two, all but one or two paragraph starts with the word, "I"... similar qquestion, this is unfinished, right?

Title article: Traning Invite
Date: 2008-04-10 15:15:15

First short paragraph, you used the word boring and to be polite as a critic, it was boring. But I read on because I knew there was no way you could fill the rest with talk of nothing to do... so, in a wierd way, you got my attention. Intended?? 
 
Get half way through and I sense you are tryng to make a story about the pleasures of trainign, nit just any training, HR Training? This is a first, read on I shall... 
 
LOL - training facilitated by my ex!... I'd end the story by getting up and walking out. 
 
The ending was flat. I think more conflict could have occurred in the dream with your ex before ending it waking up and returning to boredum. 
 
Don't let my critical words suggest it was not good, it was, I enjoyed reading, thanks

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